Push It To The Limit…Or Maybe Not?

Work Hard…Now Work Harder…

Generally speaking, we’re taught when we’re young that if you want anything, you have to work hard for it. As a child, that might mean studying extra hard to earn your desired grade. For the college student, pursue as many internships as possible to seize any job opportunities that come your way after graduation. For the working professional or stay-at-home parent, this may mean constantly reflecting on how to self-improve so you can present the best version of yourself each day. Regardless of the scenario, hard work yields desired results…or does it?

“Hard work,” I find, is subjective. When it comes to having Lupus, typical representations of hard work have rarely yielded the results I’ve desired. Quite the contrary, it’s actually landed me in the hospital, in need of physical and emotional therapy, strained relationships, and a need to constantly rebuild after experiencing feelings of helplessness time and time again. I’ve learned that when I “push it…push it…to the limit…limit,” I almost always wish I hadn’t.

This goes the same for the gym. These days, everyone seems to be obsessed with fitness. All over social media platforms, you can find influencers documenting their fitness journeys, coaches training and building their clientele, and amazing stories of how fitness has transformed lives. Let me tell you, I LOVE fitness (of all kinds) and have definitely become a “gym rat.” Fitness has supported my mental and emotional health, helped me maintain relatively high energy levels, and, over time, has helped me regain confidence by supporting the management of my weight and figure. Despite all of these benefits, over the past four years, I’ve learned that hard work at the gym also fails to yield the results I desire.

If you want those gains, you’ve got to TRAIN, TRAIN, TRAIN!!! At least, that’s what I’ve heard and thought I needed to do. But as a Lupus patient, this couldn’t be further from the truth. I would spend hours at the gym, and while I would gain definition in different parts of my body and feel absolutely amazing, my good old friend, Prednisone, would NOT let me get too excited. For those of you who don’t know, Prednisone is a corticosteroid often used by Lupus patients to reduce inflammation and manage other Lupus symptoms. Years into my fitness journey, my trainer at the time told me, “I’m going to support and train you to the best of my ability, but there are just some things that won’t be possible due to your medication.” This was an extremely hard pill to swallow, but I understood.

One of the side effects of Prednisone is weight gain, among other things. When I was first diagnosed with Lupus, I gained a total of 40 lbs. within three months! Ultimate weight loss and body transformation are nearly impossible for many Lupus patients due to their steroid intake. While this may not be a universal truth, it is the sad truth for many of us.

Despite this hard truth, I’ve learned to celebrate all of my fitness successes and all of the progress I make. For instance, last year I completed my first 5K with NYC Runs! This was a huge accomplishment for me, as I’d always wanted to run a 5K but never thought I could. It took me twice as long as my friends to reach the finish line, but I did it! I chose to focus on the accomplishment and not lose myself in a spirit of comparison. I also remember the first time I could deadlift with 25 lb. weights on either end of the barbell. Everyone I knew HAD to hear about it! There’s also the first time I completed an entire HIIT workout with 10 lb. dumbbells instead of 5 lb. ones. These may seem like small wins for the average fitness enthusiast, but for me, these wins were huge!

I want to encourage anyone who may be struggling with the spirit of comparison and having a hard time celebrating their small wins. Maybe you are learning or re-learning how to love the body you are in today. Perhaps you have been in the gym for years and are still not seeing the progress you thought you would. Your hard work may not look like the average person’s, and that’s okay! While on certain medications, your body may not ever get to the place you want it to, and that’s okay as well! That hard and ugly truth is not an invitation for you to work even harder or give up altogether. Your sweet spot is just that–sweet. And your version of hard work is going to take you exactly where you need to go….trust in that!

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Joezette's Journey: My Everyday Walk With Lupus